Copy Pasta thread

  • 269 Replies
  • 88349 Views
Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #255 on: July 10, 2021, 01:23:31 pm »
It was a calm, quiet night in Radiator Springs.

It was quite late, in fact.

All of the residents were fast asleep, dreaming of quiet drives on the country road.

Except for one resident, that is.

Lightning McQueen quietly opened the garage door of his Cozy Cone, keeping an ear out for the rumbling of a motor.

When he heard none, he quietly exited the oversized traffic cone, being careful not to make any loud or sudden noises.

While on the racetrack there may be a race for volume, tonight, he would have to keep quiet.

See, tonight he counted on the residents to be fast asleep.

He had a plan.

He had been waiting for the right night to pull it off, and that was today.

Lightning made his journey over to the V8 café.

You see, Lighting wasn’t in for a drink, tonight.

He was going to try something… a bit unconventional.

Luckily, it was at the point in the night, rather, the morning, that even Flo and Demetri weren’t awake, and wouldn’t be out to check their pumps.

Typically, one would come to the pumps for a drink.

Lightning wanted his gas somewhere other than his mouth.

He pulled into his favorite pump, taking one last look and listen around his surroundings.

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, nodding to himself in confirmation.

He popped open his tank, revving softly in anticipation.

Gently, he grabbed the nozzle, closing his eyes as he prepared himself.

With a quick breath in, he shoved the nozzle deeply into his tank, letting out a low growl, revving softly again, letting his body adjust to the new sensation.

He wiggled the nozzle around, soft pants escaping his open mouth as a soft sheen of sweat fell down his hood.

As soon as he adjusted, McQueen set forth with pressing down the lever on the nozzle, starting with a soft trickle of gas.

He moaned lewdly, revving loudly before catching himself, lowering his volume to a soft rumble.

He couldn’t help it.

Lightning felt the slow drip of fluid deep inside of him, sloshing around in his near empty tank.

He plunged the nozzle deeper into his cussy, pressing the lever even more, as a steady, thick stream of gas began to flow, puddling in his insides as he began to really fill up.

A trickle of fluid began to drip from his muffler, the tickle heating up his insides with a pronounced rev and deep, guttural groan that cut straight to his core.

His paint job was shimmering beneath the sweat covering himself.

“Nnnngggggg, ugh, Kachow!”

He began to vibrate.

“uh! Oh fuh-UUUHN,”

As he filled up, gyrating in his wheels, rocking back and forth beneath the feeling of hot gas filling him up, and the trickle of his own fluids out of his vibrating muffler.

He had to remind himself to be quiet, not to wake up anyone in his fit of pleasure.

As he moaned, revved, rocked, and leaked, he couldn’t help but to think of his best friend, Mater.

Ohhh, those soft, gentle eyes, the buck teeth he kept crisply white despite the case of his rusting body, but he still felt that rust so endearing.

He couldn’t help but to think “oH!” of that hot, rusty body thrusting deep into his c-ussy.

“M-Mater! Fuck, rIGHT THERE!” He dropped low on his back tires, running his moist muffler against the smooth new concrete that he had just laid down. “Shi-kACHOW, UhN!”

Just the image of that thick, brown body sent Lightning into depravity.

Lighting was almost filled to the brim, but that wasn’t enough.

He wanted more.

No, he NEEDED, more.

In a fit of passion, he ripped the nozzle from his tank, slamming it deep into his hot, wet muffler, crying loudly into the night, “OH FUCK, MATER, RAM ME DEEP IN THE MUFFLER, FILL ME WITH YOUR FUEL, POUND ME INTO THE PAVEMENT, KUHHHHHHHCHOOOOOOOOWWWWWW!!! OH MATER, IM SO CLOSE, IM CLOSE, IM CLOSE hUnnnggyeeeeAAAHHHHHHH”

Gas flowed freely everywhere, deep inside of all of his pipes, and coating the ground underneath him as he vibrated, revved, growled, hailed to the gods, as he was brought so, so close, until-

“Lightning?” Mater asked bleary eyed as he approached the pump.

“YES MATER, Kach-ACK! Uhhghhhhh”” And Lighting tipped over into pure ecstasy, gas and all other fluids flowed everywhere, coating everything.

His engine revved one last ear-piercing time, before he slumped over on the concrete, heaving with each and every breath.

“Bu-…Buddy, what’s going on?” Mater looked toward his friend, concern and… and disgust reading across his eyes. Lighting’s eyes shot open, shame coating every nerve inside of him.

“Oh, oh GOD! Please, it’s not what you think!” He pleaded with Mater.

Everyone else in the town had woken up, and they all slowly drove up to him, shocked.

“Friend… I only think of you like that. Er- like a friend. That’s it…” Mater started to back up, away from McQueen. “Pal, I think we shouldn’t see each other anymore… I can’t forget this… The pollution... this oil. It’s changing the man you used to be...”

Mater drove away, and McQueen was left with the shame of what he had done.

He looked up to the residents surrounding him, including Flo, who’s pump he had defiled.

Doc was the first to open his mouth. “Kid… I think it’s best if you leave…”

This sentiment was shared through the mumbling of everyone else, and the disgust clearly shown on everyone’s faces.

“I- I-,” He tried, filling with self-disgust.

“Just go, Kid!” Doc raised his voice, closing his eyes as if he couldn’t even stand the sight of him. “You... this generation is spoiled by this poison... this pollution. You are no men anymore.”

Without any further words and a deep sigh, Lightning began
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #256 on: July 11, 2021, 11:53:55 am »
What the fuck is wrong with this place? I've been visiting this discord for a week now and so far I have:
1. Had my life threatened by someone claiming to be an ex-Navy Seal
2. Been told in multiple paragraphs that I will never have ovaries or be a woman
3. Been called Rabbi more times than I can count
Every time I try to get a genuine response from any of you people when I address what I have been told, I'm either called an n-word or k*ke, and am then told to "dilate", "glow" or "kill myself".
Can we please have just a normal conversation where we can talk about memes without racist slurs and the weird terminology?! What the hell is a sneed anyway?
m'lady

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #257 on: July 11, 2021, 11:59:09 am »
Here are 12 important questions and answers before considering getting vaccinated:

●”If I get vaccinated can I stop wearing a mask(s)?”
Government: “NO”

●”If I get vaccinated will the restaurants, bars, schools, fitness clubs, hair salons, etc. reopen and will people be able to get back to work like normal?
Government: “NO”

●”If I get vaccinated will I be resistant to Covid?”
Government: “Maybe. We don’t know exactly, but probably not.”

●”If I get vaccinated, at least I won’t be contagious to others – right?”
Government: “NO. the vaccine doesn’t stop transmission.”

●”If I get vaccinated, how long will the vaccine last?”
Government: “No one knows. All Covid “vaccines” are still in the experimental stage.”

● “If I get vaccinated, can I stop social distancing?”
Government: “NO”

● “If my parents, grandparents and myself all get vaccinated can we hug each other again?”
Government: “NO”

● “So what’s the benefit of getting vaccinated?”
Government: “Hoping that the virus won’t kill you.”

●”Are you sure the vaccine won’t injure or kill me?”
Government: “NO”

●”If statistically the virus won’t kill me (99.7% survival rate), why should I get vaccinated?”
Government: “To protect others.”

●”So if I get vaccinated, I can protect 100% of people I come in contact with?”
Government: “NO”

● “If I experience a severe adverse reaction, long-term effects (still unknown) or die from the vaccine will I (or my family) be compensated from the vaccine manufacture or the Government?”
Government: “NO – the government and vaccine manufacturer’s have 100% zero liability regarding this experimental drug”

So to summarize, the Covid19 “vaccine”…

Does not provide immunity
Does not eliminate the virus
Does not prevent death
Does not guarantee you won’t get it
Does not stop you from passing it o
m'lady

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #258 on: August 16, 2021, 12:00:59 am »
I’m genetically klinefelters and 5ARD yeah. 5ARD gave me ambiguous genitalia, which contains a very underdeveloped vaginal canal partially fused with my urethra in the front. XXY with Y translocation (I prob lost a Y here or there) gave me a uterus, but I have a pair of internal testes. One of the testes seem to have a bit of ovarian tissue, since I produce enough local estrogen to menstruate (30-50 pg/ml) despite having total T levels of 670 ng/dl. When I get a period, I piss out half of it, due to genital ambiguity. I cannot get pregnant, as I do not ovulate. Likely, my inability fo produce DHT also plays a role in how my menstrual cycle can happe
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #259 on: August 29, 2021, 03:28:16 pm »
 if a dolphin hits the side of your house, don't go outside to check on the dolphin.  That's how the hurricane gets you.
m'lady

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #260 on: September 06, 2021, 02:46:53 pm »
So that's a yes? We're gonna take you out to a nice dinner at Golden Corral (you buy the soda) and then my wife and I are going to treat you like a bunch of hooligans with dirt bikes in a rock quarry at a seedy motel room.

RACHEL TIPPED 101 CORAL FOR THIS POST

RACHEL TIPPED FOR THIS POST

m'lady

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #261 on: January 08, 2022, 05:07:41 pm »
Fuck you.

Fuck you. You useless piece of shit. You absolute waste of space and air. You uneducated, ignorant, idiotic dumb swine, you’re an absolute embarrassment to humanity and all life as a whole. The magnitude of your failure just now is so indescribably massive that one hundred years into the future your name will be used as moniker of evil for heretics. Even if all of humanity put together their collective intelligence there is no conceivable way they could have thought up a way to fuck up on the unimaginable scale you just did. When Jesus died for our sins, he must not have seen the sacrilegious act we just witnessed you performing, because if he did he would have forsaken humanity long ago so that your birth may have never become reality. After you die, your skeleton will be displayed in a museum after being scientifically researched so that all future generations may learn not to generate your bone structure, because every tiny detail anyone may have in common with you degrades them to a useless piece of trash and a burden to society. No wonder your father questioned whether or not your were truly his son, for you'd have to not be a waste of carbon matter for anyone to love you like a family member. Your birth made it so that mankind is worse of in every way you can possibly imagine, and you have made it so that society can never really recover into a state of organization. Everything has forever fallen into a bewildering chaos, through which unrecognizable core, you can only find misfortune. I would say the apocalypse is upon us but this is merely the closest word humans have for the sheer scale of horror that is now reality. You have forever condemned everyone you love and know into an eternal state of suffering, worse than any human concept of hel
signatures

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #262 on: March 03, 2022, 08:38:16 pm »
I am living in your walls.

You may be concerned about this. In case you are, please read the below:

FAQ:

Why are you living in my walls?

I'm not going to tell you.

Are you only in my walls?

You could say I am living in everybody's walls, but in the case I am telling you that I am living in your walls, I am living in your walls.

How are you surviving in my walls?

In my non-physical form, I am crawling around listening for you. That is all I need to survive in that form. In my physical form, I survive by eating rat corpses that I cook using the wall behind your oven, and I drink the vapour in the extraction fan duct above your shower.

What are you planning to do in my walls?

Live in them, listening to you.

What do I do about you living in my walls?

Listen for the scraping. Dont touch the walls. Protect yourself. Avoid lighting candles.

When are you going to stop living in my walls?

You cannot escape me.

Do I call the police?

The authorities will not help you.

What are the consequences of you living in my walls?

Be aware.

What if I am ok with you living in my walls?

I will make sure you’re not.

Are you imaginary?

I AM LIVING IN YOUR WALLS I AM LIVING IN YOUR WALLS I AM LIVING IN YOUR WALLS I AM LIVING IN YOUR WALLS I AM LIVING IN YOUR WALLS I AM LIVING IN YOUR WALLS I AM LIVING IN YOUR WALLS I AM LIVING IN YOUR WALLS

If there are any more questions then please consult your walls by directly speaking to them.

Summary:

I am living in your walls.
no don't

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #263 on: March 27, 2022, 01:34:20 pm »
I’m going to try and get through this without crying. Somethings been on my mind and I need to address this and take accountability.

To all my PogChamps and piss babies, I'm sorry-pilled. To all the himbo simps and normie incels, F in the chat. I horny posted on main, and that was cringecore to say the least. I'm working hard to stop being the shit lib sigma cumlord. I'm working hard every day to be the turbo-charged mommy dom gamer-girl that I know that I can be. In the past, I was in power-cringe mode, but I'm built different now. I'm based and chadpilled, and I hope you all can see that. I need a big cope. My vibes have apology energy right now, and I just hope you guys are forgiveness-pilled.
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #264 on: November 11, 2022, 02:21:42 pm »
sighhhhhh looks like i do have to spell this out for you rachel dont i. our friendship, which turned out to be anything but, is over. i dont need people like you in my life. stop trying to talk to me, leave me alone. is that clear enough for you

RACHEL TIPPED 101 CORAL FOR THIS POST

no don't

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #265 on: May 31, 2023, 10:31:30 pm »
Dicks are so cute oh my god uwu when you hold one in your hand and it starts twitching like it's nuzzling you UwU and when they perk up and they're like Ohhh nyaaa~~ hehe and penis-kun is so happy uwu and it's the most adorable thing ever when sperm sama comes out and they're really shy so you have to work HARD and when penis-kun and sperm sama meet and they're blushing and it's all lke UwU~~~~ penis-kun is so adorable uwuuuuu
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #266 on: June 07, 2023, 10:49:08 pm »
Quote
Listen here cum-slut, I bet you 5 million dollars that you don’t own a bird. But guess what? I own 7. And I can tell you right now that a bird would never just walk into something like a chocolate fountain. They’ll rarely walk directly into water.

But say that your idiotic theory is correct.

Say it did actually walk into it.

That animal still probably died.

Is that still funny to you? Do you still get your kicks out of knowing that that bird was probably terrified and opening its mouth to scream in that last panel?

And if you say yes then you seriously disgust me as a human being.
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #267 on: June 22, 2023, 12:13:27 am »
Happy Solstice everyone!
No 🙅 more seed 👦 oils 💦 No ♂💡 sunscreen 😩 No sunglasses No 🔥🚫 micro plastics 👉 Natural remedies only - If 🤷🔟 he vapes…🤷🔟 just 😶 no - Trash his 👇👑 AirPods Trash his 🙋💦 fluoride toothpaste Trash his aluminum deodorant Only 👏 organic produce Get 🌾❤ him 💬😩 blue ♂ light 💡🕯 blockers Cook him steak & burgers ❗ Never let his 💦💦 phone touch 👈🙌 his 💦 balls Replace 👱👱 his lotion 👙👙 with 👏🐺 beef tallow Get him taking magnesium bc 💁💁 he’s 🔑 probably deficient Add minerals & electrolytes to 👏😆 his 👏 water 💦💦 100% 💯💯 cotton underwear only
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #268 on: June 22, 2023, 12:49:49 am »
OH NO ТЫ КУСОК ДЕРЬМА YOU MISTYPED CODE НЕПРАВИЛЬНЫЙ ВВОД КОДА STALIN WILL BE PISSED СЛАВА СТАЛИНУ HE WILL FIND YOU У СТАЛИНА ВЕЗДЕ ГЛАЗА AND HE WILL SEND YOU TO FUCKING SIBERIA ТЫ ГРЕБАНЫЙ ШВАЙНЕХУНД GAY ASSHOLE ПЕДИК ДОИТ СИСЬКИ GET READY ГОЛОДОМОР БЫЛ ВИНОЙ ХРУЩЕВА YOUR ASSHOLE WILL BE PURGED МЫ ИМЕЕМ В ВИДУ, ЧТО У ТЕБЯ БУКВАЛЬНО БОЛЬШЕ НЕ БУДЕТ ЗАДНИЦЫ

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #269 on: October 27, 2024, 10:24:49 pm »
This song reminds me of a twitter thread I read once. The person theorized that the next genocide will be presented to and accepted by the masses as our loved ones simply being uploaded to the cloud. All of the data available about a person would be used to create an ai personality that was a convincing enough approximation to make a person's loved ones believe that it was really them and that  it was possible to upload their consciousness into the cloud. This would allow them to accept if/when their loved ones were murdered, because they would believe that it's only their organic body that dies and their consciousness is still alive because they can still communicate with the ai personality. In reality, the ruling class is just culling the masses, since so many will be rendered useless by automation and would be considered a waste of resources.
*spork*