Copy Pasta thread

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redheron's Avatar

redheron

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #15 on: April 11, 2017, 11:17:51 AM »
Okay, everybody, I have a story about random shit in college. When I was in college, there was a particular class I took where, no matter what time you walked into class, if you made it into the room before the professor, you wouldn?t be counted late. I mean, that?s a pretty cool policy, given how some professors are really obnoxious about attendance.

Well, one time, a fellow student of mine was running late to class. As she reached the edge of the building, she saw her professor making it to the front steps (super long rectangular building here). He looks up from walking and he sees her. He then points to his watch, gives her a well-meaning ?Look who?s late? face, and walks on inside.

What he didn?t know, though, was that this particular student was like freakishly good at bouldering and related climbing skills, so she was just like ?Fuck it? and SCALED THE BUILDING!

She tapped on the window of the 4th floor classroom (the floors had like 20ft ceilings, so, she was quite a ways up there), nearly making one student piss himself. They opened the window, she rolled through, onto the floor, and slid into her seat about five seconds before the professor opened the door to the classroom.

He did a double take, started to say ?How the hell d?? when a security guard ran in, red-faced and panting, pointed at her and bellowed ?STOP DOING THAT!?

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #16 on: April 14, 2017, 02:44:41 AM »
Hello,
I hope you week is going well! I am looking to meet some new people for a FWB type of situation. Figured why not be upfront and see if anyone is interested. Let me know if you are? If not that's fine just let me know and I will not pester you. Hope to hear from you.
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #17 on: April 14, 2017, 02:48:47 AM »
Hey there.
I assume you are not interested since you did not respond. I will not pester you again if I do not hear back from you in the next few days. If I don't good luck in you search!
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #18 on: April 14, 2017, 03:30:13 PM »
After doing some background research, the sad part about Joe Bernstein is that this kind of yellow journalism should be far below him.

His father was a lawyer for the US Department of Justice, he grew up in a million dollar home, he went to an expensive prep school, then graduated and went to an even more expensive private university. His parents likely spent over half a million on his education alone. He is the embodiment of privilege.

Yet what should read like the early history of a journalist who now spends his days uncovering government corruption, or providing a voice for the downtrodden, is instead that of a man who uses his position at Buzzfeed to attack artists and comedians who dare go against the status quo. This is what all that money and education was leading up to? Making petty appeals to Time Warner in an effort to have people fired?

He does this in between writing hard-hitting pieces like Sonos To Add Amazon Alexa Voice Control In 2017 or 8 Reasons Why You Might Quit Pok?mon Go. The first instinct is to despise him, but really, we should pity him.

His is the story of a boring rich kid, who grew up to be a boring writer, who now uses his meager position to attack genuinely original and creative people. Is it any wonder he resents Sam? His money and privilege can never buy him what Sam has managed to achieve through sheer work and determination. So he does what any miserable person does, which is to try to tear down that which he cannot have.

Poor Joe Bernstein.
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redheron

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #19 on: April 17, 2017, 01:41:11 PM »
the other night i tried to make a curry and i got chilli burns all over my face, so i thought to myself ?hang on, doesn?t milk soothe chilli burns? it does? and i couldn?t google because i couldn?t see so i just had to blindly feel my way to the fridge and pour out a bowl of milk, and then plant my face in the bowl of milk, anyway at that point the rice cooker went off and triggered a power surge which turned my electricity off, which i didn?t notice at first because i had my face in a bowl of milk and when i did emerge from the dairy prison i thought i had gone blind with chilli burns. so no i don?t really cook much.

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #20 on: April 17, 2017, 04:20:49 PM »
the other night i tried to make a curry and i got chilli burns all over my face, so i thought to myself ?hang on, doesn?t milk soothe chilli burns? it does? and i couldn?t google because i couldn?t see so i just had to blindly feel my way to the fridge and pour out a bowl of milk, and then plant my face in the bowl of milk, anyway at that point the rice cooker went off and triggered a power surge which turned my electricity off, which i didn?t notice at first because i had my face in a bowl of milk and when i did emerge from the dairy prison i thought i had gone blind with chilli burns. so no i don?t really cook much.

hahahaha HOLY SHIT

what a story

for real though one time I accidentally rubbed some pepper oil under my nose / lip and it burned so bad I had to put my nose in a glass of milk
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Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #21 on: April 20, 2017, 11:45:27 PM »
What we grew up believing to be "news" was actually just sway pieces meant to push public opinion in one direction or another. (Operation Mockingbird). Nowadays people are increasingly getting news from sites like Reddit and Facebook. Elites want to maintain control over public sentiment, so it's predictable that this would happen. After controlling money and military, public opinion is the third most important thing to maintaining power.
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Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #22 on: April 21, 2017, 03:01:56 AM »
homosexuality IS god?s gift to windows Server 2012
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Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #23 on: April 21, 2017, 06:10:13 AM »
Hi!

You got me very interested. I would really like to know you closer!
I want to communicate with you and learn about your interests, hobbies.
I hope for mutual understanding and possible reciprocity.

Actually, I would like to meet and talk with an interesting and nice man!
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #24 on: April 21, 2017, 06:10:35 AM »
What's up, Big Boy?

My name is Violette, what's yours? I can not wait to meet you in private.
I was going to have a nice talk with you in chat but you had gone offline.

May I ask you to write me a few words some day? Trust me, it's going to be lots of fun.
I'll be waiting for your letter...

Do not respond to this message, reply to address https://chat.wetfish.net



Love and kisses,
Violette
*spork*

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #25 on: May 07, 2017, 03:28:33 PM »
i want knowing of the usefulness of this file as being read as a jpeg
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Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #26 on: May 11, 2017, 01:00:38 AM »
bighugejake1 hour ago
In the comments:
1) Where's Canada?
2) AP World History Exam takers
3) such popularity, very trending
4) Quotes from the video we all just watched
5) Normies who don't get the video
6) watched this on drugs!! lmao 420 XD
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redheron's Avatar

redheron

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #27 on: May 12, 2017, 05:36:34 PM »
the reason why people are so hard to read is because they are composed of the letters a, t, c, and g in random sequences and as im sure you know, that doesn?t spell anything

RACHEL TIPPED 20 CORAL FOR THIS POST


Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #28 on: May 16, 2017, 12:09:12 AM »
lmao this is pure gold.

You should've travelled to Thailand if you're looking for sex vacation. It's a whole lot cheaper.

You're 32 and have never had girlfriend. So you think travelling to Tokyo, which is pretty much flooded with white men will get you laid? Lmao there might be a couple of gaijin hunters on the lookout but given the fact that you travel to the other side of the planet to get some tells me that they'll rather go for the better looking ones.
*spork*

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redheron

Re: Copy Pasta thread
« Reply #29 on: May 17, 2017, 02:32:24 PM »
the real takeaway from both fyre festival and the cask of amontillado is that you can lure rich people anywhere by promising them exclusive access to an expensive luxury