why do we bother with I hate my partner jokes when your boss is right there. s/(wife|husband|spouse)/boss/gi;
Me: I feel fat, can you give me a compliment?
Boss: Can you stay late tonight?
- If you were my [employee] I'd poison your coffee.
- If you were my [boss], I'd drink it.
Arguing with a [Boss] is like reading the software licence agreement; in the end, you'll get in trouble anyways so you just skip to the end and say "I agree."
- Where's your [boss]?
- In the garden.
- I don't see him.
- You have to dig a little.
Want to know what it's like being [employed]? chain yourself to a bear then kick the bear.